Hugging my fears

I just came back from an open water training swim for the triathlon I'm doing this Saturday, and I'm totally stressed. My breathing was short and shallow, and my heartbeat skyrocketed.

I hate water. I hate open water. I think Jaws when I'm in water. I think of the expansive unknown that is beneath me when I'm swimming. An unknown that is dark and unpenetrable.

But I'm going to continue to hold on to this fear. I'm going to think about it now, I'll think about it before I go to bed, and I'll think about it first thing tomorrow. I'm going to hold, embrace, and hug this negativity until it becomes a positive. Until it becomes manageable, or I find hacks to make it manageable.